Hakomi & Healing: An Interview with Hakomi Practitioner Rachael Koeson

Hakomi Blog Photo

Hakomi can provide healing through mindfulness.

— by Beth Singleton, Birth Quest doula and photographer

In May of 2016, I attended a postpartum mood disorder class in Grand Rapids. As someone who supports moms – and as someone who struggles with bouts of anxiety and depression – I was eager to learn as much as I could.

Navigating my way through the parking lot, looking for the entrance, I noticed a woman who I figured was probably doing the same thing I was. But there was something about her that stood out to me, and I gravitated towards her without any real thought. Her energy was warm and kind. We met in the parking lot and found our way in together.

There had to be at least a hundred people there for the class, probably more as they couldn’t all fit in the main room. We (Rachael and I) sat together and got acquainted. I was one among a handful of doulas in the room. Rachael, however, was one of a kind.

In the short time we spent there that day, I did my best to take in and understand what Hakomi was. We’ve even kept in touch since then; but to this day, I’ve wanted to know more. Thankfully, Rachael, who practices through her business, Making Space Hakomi, was kind enough to oblige my request for an interview.

I hope you’ll all enjoy what she has to share. As she is just getting started on this path, I also hope you’ll all welcome her and encourage her on in her calling to serve women and their families.

Beth: First of all, what is Hakomi? I know when I met you, it wasn’t something I’d ever heard of and I haven’t really met anyone else who has.

Rachael: Hakomi is a mindfulness-based, body-centered form of assisted self-discovery. It is also experiential. What this means is that we work to stay mindful and in the present moment to explore our underlying unconscious beliefs about ourselves and the world. Often we learn a lot when we pay close and respectful attention to the wisdom of our bodies. It is an extremely gentle, respectful and sensitive method that understands the client to be the expert of themselves; the job of the Practitioner is to assist the client to maintain mindfulness and help guide them toward a more complete awareness of themselves.

Beth: What was it about Hakomi that appealed to you?

Rachael: I knew from my experience as a client that it really works and it felt so much more elegant and respectful than anything else I had tried. I love the founding principles of non-violence, organicity, unity, mindfulness and body-mind holism.

Beth: What inspired you to become a practitioner?

Rachael: My own experience as a client. It was a truly transformative experience for me through which I realized so many things about myself that I hadn’t consciously been aware of before and I felt like I gave (with the help of my Practitioner) those wounded places within myself the healing they needed; that resulted in really knowing I could choose to inhabit my life differently than I had been before. The result is that I generally feel more resourced, more connected to myself and able to connect with others, more aware of my unconscious beliefs and more able to make more life-affirming and nourishing choices in my daily life. Of course, I have hard days and I forget all these things sometimes, but generally feel much more whole, aware and vibrant than I did before going through my Hakomi process. I continue to learn and struggle but am so grateful for what I continue to learn through this lovely method.

Beth: What kind of training did you have to complete in order to become a practitioner?

Rachael: I completed an 18 month comprehensive training program through the Hakomi Institute. I then completed the certification process, which is based on competence rather than hours, about 16 months after I graduated from the program.

Beth: How would you say Hakomi is helpful for women before, during, or after pregnancy?

Rachael: The transition into motherhood or transitioning from mothering one to two or two to three children, etc. is significant in all women’s lives. So much happens to women as we go through that process. It is a time when we can be particularly vulnerable and particularly in need of extra support to find our footing in who we are and how we want to embody our life as a person who is also a mother. The way that process unfolds is different for everyone, but across the board it is a unique time of life that lends itself to mindful self-discovery as we come face to face with a lot of our own wounding, fears, desires and the impacts of our personal history. Hakomi is such a lovely way of learning to be with and learn from those parts of ourselves that can arise during times of transition.

Beth: What are some of the reasons women might seek out the assistance of a Hakomi practitioner?

Rachael: I often see clients who are having trouble transitioning into motherhood, feeling stuck in behavior patterns that don’t serve them or interacting with their children in ways that feel triggered but not grounded or based on their truest desire for how to be in relationship with their child(ren).

Beth: Is Hakomi something that can help new parents adjust to the changes they’ll face as well? If so, how?

Rachael: Absolutely. Hakomi is based on the idea that when we are mindful and we have a skilled assistant on our side we can uncover our unconscious beliefs that often drive our behaviors and ways we live in the world. Hakomi allows us to gently make space for the wounded parts of ourselves that can become particularly activated upon becoming a parent as so many of our developmental wounds
are revealed as our children grow. Hakomi also provides amazing and individualized resources and skills that people can take home with them and practice using in their daily lives.

Beth: I see you have a Mindful Mothering Support Group coming up in November. Is this a little different than other support groups for moms and if so, how?

Rachael: Yes. This is a unique support group because it is founded in mindfulness. Mindfulness is slowing down, being aware and also cultivating a sense of non-judgement or curiosity. So we will engage in some guided meditation time and be able to study what arises during those times of mindfulness. It will be a highly facilitated group where participants will be encouraged to speak from their present experience rather than retell the “story” of their struggles. In doing that we can more easily access the issues UNDER the story and hopefully offer some healing to those places that need it.

Beth: Do you offer any other classes or provide private consultations?

Rachael: Yes. I provide one-on-one sessions as well as an eco-grief mindful support group which is designed to support people who deeply feel the pain of the earth and the damage we have done to it in this moment in time. The goal is to provide a safe space to share grief and pain and also allow those feelings to flow and move and see what else can arise through that process. This is inspired by the work of Joanna Macy and her book, “Active Hope.”

Beth: Is there anything else you’d like to share?

Rachael: Thank you for the opportunity to share about Hakomi. I am grateful. I have myself worked at a college for midwives, trained as a birth and postpartum doula, volunteered as a postpartum doula and experienced postpartum mood disorders. So I have a deep well of empathy, compassion, and resonance with the struggles that come with the transition into mothering and learning how to be who you truly are in the new and overwhelming role of parent.

Beth: Thank you so much, Rachael, for your time and help with this. I can honestly see how this is something everyone could benefit from, and I hope that services like yours continue to grow and help people heal.

Cooperative Childbirth Education: Class Descriptions

Cooperative Childbirth Education classes in Muskegon

Birth Quest’s fall 2017 and winter 2018 childbirth education classes can be taken a la carte.

Interested in attending childbirth education classes, but don’t have the time to research your options, travel outside of Muskegon or attend a full series?

Busy families like yours want to be able to make the best use of their valuable time when expecting a new addition. That’s why Birth Quest offers a la cart classes so that you can seek out knowledge according to your unique interests and circumstances. I have taught a wide variety of classes privately, in group settings, for non-profit organizations, and as a guest presenter in classrooms. Since 2014, I have taught classes in the following settings (places in italics were as a volunteer):

Please contact me if you would like to host a class!

Are you having trouble deciding which classes to attend? Check out the class descriptions below:

  • Choices in Childbirth: Providers and Settings — Did you know that the choice of where and with whom to give birth best predictor how it will turn out? The purpose of this class is to educate you about all of your choices are so that you can give birth where you feel safest and the most supported.
  • Self-Care for Your Changing Body — This class is for those who are motivated to optimize their health during pregnancy through diet, movement and tending to their emotional needs. Strategies for alleviating common pregnancy discomforts will also be shared.
  • Holistic Pregnancy Care Options — Many families are turning to less invasive and more natural solutions during pregnancy and birth. This class will look at several different complementary and alternative medicine options, along with where to find practitioners in the Muskegon area.
  • Birth Plans: What Parents Need to Know — There sure are a lot of choices to be made when having a baby! You will leave this class confident, knowing what the available research says about birth plans, staff responses and birth outcomes. Parents will be provided with multiple templates for creating a birth plan, as well as advice for forgoing a birth plan altogether. Whatever families decide, they will learn all the key decision-making points from early labor to common newborn procedures and everything in between.
  • Labor & Delivery: Prepared & Informed — Birth is unpredictable, full of unexpected twists and turns, making it something families anticipate with both excitement and apprehension. Highlights of this class include indications for, risks and benefits of and how to prevent common interventions, such as inductions, episiotomy and cesarean. Childbirth education does not guarantee an outcome, but it can lead to empowerment: knowledge is power!
  • Essentials of Labor Support: What Birthing People Need — This class is for the birthing person and whoever they choose to support them during labor and delivery, including spouses, partners, friends and family members. Topics include communication skills, practicing massage comfort techniques and so much more!
  • Pain-Coping Strategies: A Smorgasbord of Options — Pain relief during labor is a primary concern for many pregnant people. Some believe that they must choose between no pain relief or an epidural. Fortunately, we’ve come a long way since the days of a one-size-fits-all approach. We will explore a full spectrum of both pharmaceutical and natural ways to lessen and cope with the pain of childbirth.
  • Postpartum Wellness: The Fourth Trimester — This class is focused on the physical and emotional health of parents after a birth. We will cover recovery from a vaginal or a cesarean birth, movement, nutrition and mental health with lots of resources for further exploration. This class is appropriate for any expectant or new parent.
  • Newborn Care — Babies aren’t born with an instruction manual, but the good news is that you are the expert on caring for your baby! We will cover what to expect from newborns in terms of appearance and behavior, as well as bonding, development, diapering, bathing, safe sleep and more!
  • Breastfeed Successfully with Knowledge & Support — This class is for anyone interested in learning more about the benefits of breastfeeding how it works, and how to avoid common pitfalls, as well as community resources to support breastfeeding families.
  • Childbirth After Cesarean: Making Informed Decisions — With about 1/3 of West Michigan moms delivering their babies via cesarean, many are faced with limited future childbearing options. This class seeks to inform and empower families before and during pregnancy to make the best decisions for themselves and their families.
  • Introduction to Birth Work: Doulas & Childbirth Educators — This class explains possible career paths for doulas and childbirth educators, what they do and how they positively impact birth outcomes. The presentation concludes with a sample childbirth education class.

You can find out about upcoming classes on my calendar or under “events” on Birth Quest’s Facebook page.

Classes can be tailored to suit the needs of any setting or population, like youth, maternal and infant health professionals, homeless shelters, or places of worship. Presentations can also be developed to cover other specific topics, like pregnancy complications, anger management during pregnancy, substance abuse prevention or parenting. What topics would you like to see Birth Quest offer?

Coming Out as an LGBT Welcoming Business

welcoming project rainbow

As a person who has dedicated much of her life to fighting for equality and social justice, I knew that the journey is not without its obstacles.  Over the years, I’ve messed up more than once.  My mistakes have taught me that my biases can fool me and that I must never stop examining and reexamining my own privilege.  Putting yourself out there as an ally is a vulnerable position because you invite accusations of hypocrisy.  I’ve been called out on many occasions and had to defend myself or apologize.  Even though it is work, I welcome the opportunity for personal growth, a precursor to societal transformation, toward an end to oppression.

When I first started my work as a doula, my goal was to serve all families without discrimination or judgment.  Despite my best intentions, I had to be honest with myself that I lacked the experience and training to feel confident in serving LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) families.  Since then, I have taken these steps:

1.)           Inclusivity.  I re-wrote my intake forms so that instead of asking information on the baby’s “mom” and “dad,” I now have space for information on up to four parents.  This allows families to define their own roles, separate from gender, as well as include information on biological and adoptive parents.

2.)           Continuing education.  I found a wonderful resource in The National LGBT Health Education Center.    Their on-demand webinars taught me so much about health disparities, pathways to parenting and ways to be more welcoming in my practice.

3.)           Visibility.  I have a listing on the resource directory, Trans Birth, “created to connect Trans* and gender non-conforming people and their families to midwives, OB/GYNs, and doulas who provide welcoming care to our communities.”

This is just a start.  In the coming year, I plan to create a local resource list of welcoming providers in my community.  Do you provide welcoming healthcare services in West Michigan or have a favorite resource you’d like to share?  Please contact me!